Tribal Wars 2 - The *** Wars Mockumentary

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DeletedUser5650

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As The *** Wars close to a near end, a new era dawns on the horizon of Tribal Wars 2.

It is now the era of THE *** WARS.

Brought to you, in many cases, by none other than the fine players that were protagonists of The ***Wars.

Still believing in the "Rules Don't Apply To Me" (RDATM) faith intersecting with the "I Can't Be Bothered To Farm" (ICBBTF) faith all working under the "No One Will Notice" (NOWN) version of the St Cheat's bible, they have procreated without contraception and have produced lots of little baby *** Villages spread around the server. Sometimes lonely ones - cast off into the rim of the Server, sometimes grouped together in a nest aka....

Now while I am normally happy to see people of different faiths collaborating, these poor babies do not have to wait for their parents to come feed them, no, this is Child Labour (boo). They are expected to provide, daily, sometimes more frequently, a delivery of resources to their parents without even farming for it. Their growth is stunted. They will never achieve full size, deprived as they are of the resources they need to grow.

Wait, I hear you ask, how do we prevent this forced labour, this hell of a life, living just to provide for others? Well, it's fairly easy. The inherent laziness of the ICBBTF practitioners has been dominant in many cases. Keen eyes can compare the achievements of these baby *** with a real player and note deficits in their development. Of the symptoms that can be seen, the dominant symptom is a high Special Delivery rate.

This is often combined with one or more of the following :
An inexistent First Blood achievement (attack 3 times)
Low or inexistent Plunderer achievements
Low or inexistent Stolen Goods achievements
Collaboration 1 (because who can be bothered to log out and log back in again to each alt)
A paladin which suspiciously seems to be invited to lots of parties
A lack of bashpoints OR too many bp for the rest of their achievements. Each new *** village is born with 50 spears and these are sometimes forced to work in their parents' village.

In general there will be an Inexplicable lack of achievements for a player that actually plays the game but somehow manages to send resources somewhere, but obviously not to their tribe mates because either they have none, or the biggest player in their tribe is OBVIOUSLY not receiving any res given their small stature - someone using up all that res would either have surpassed a certain size or would have troop recruitment achievements out of this world, especially in early game.

I URGE you, in the interests of these small, mistreated, *** Villages and those that live in them, to report them to the local authorities (Click Contact Support - 0800 NO MORE ***) and let them live out the rest of their natural lives in peace.

Hopefully, at some point in the future, we can endeavour to get to the Fair Play Wars which should be in the future.
 
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CAERUS

Tribal Wars 2 Team
As The Bot Wars close to a near end, a new era dawns on the horizon of Tribal Wars 2.

It is now the era of THE ALT WARS.

Brought to you, in many cases, by none other than the fine players that were protagonists of The Bot Wars.

Still believing in the "Rules Don't Apply To Me" (RDATM) faith intersecting with the "I Can't Be Bothered To Farm" (ICBBTF) faith all working under the "No One Will Notice" (NOWN) version of the St Cheat's bible, they have procreated without contraception and have produced lots of little baby Alt Villages spread around the server. Sometimes lonely ones - cast off into the rim of the Server, sometimes grouped together in a nest aka tribe *cough* Roughies *cough*

Now while I am normally happy to see people of different faiths collaborating, these poor babies do not have to wait for their parents to come feed them, no, this is Child Labour (boo). They are expected to provide, daily, sometimes more frequently, a delivery of resources to their parents without even farming for it. Their growth is stunted. They will never achieve full size, deprived as they are of the resources they need to grow.

Wait, I hear you ask, how do we prevent this forced labour, this hell of a life, living just to provide for others? Well, it's fairly easy. The inherent laziness of the ICBBTF practitioners has been dominant in many cases. Keen eyes can compare the achievements of these baby Alts with a real player and note deficits in their development. Of the symptoms that can be seen, the dominant symptom is a high Special Delivery rate.

This is often combined with one or more of the following :
An inexistent First Blood achievement (attack 3 times)
Low or inexistent Plunderer achievements
Low or inexistent Stolen Goods achievements
Collaboration 1 (because who can be bothered to log out and log back in again to each alt)
A paladin which suspiciously seems to be invited to lots of parties
A lack of bashpoints OR too many bp for the rest of their achievements. Each new alt village is born with 50 spears and these are sometimes forced to work in their parents' village.

In general there will be an Inexplicable lack of achievements for a player that actually plays the game but somehow manages to send resources somewhere, but obviously not to their tribe mates because either they have none, or the biggest player in their tribe is OBVIOUSLY not receiving any res given their small stature - someone using up all that res would either have surpassed a certain size or would have troop recruitment achievements out of this world, especially in early game.

I URGE you, in the interests of these small, mistreated, Alt Villages and those that live in them, to report them to the local authorities (Click Contact Support - 0800 NO MORE ALTS) and let them live out the rest of their natural lives in peace.

Hopefully, at some point in the future, we can endeavour to get to the Fair Play Wars which should be in the future.


Zekk Id like to remind you from refraining to deal with the matter publicly but instead submit a support ticket and we will investigate this properly.

This matter wont last long, I can assure you.

As much as I enjoyed reading this can you perhaps edit certain parts and about certain tribes? that way I dont have to remove it all together.

Thanks.
 
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DeletedUser5650

Guest
Zekk Id like to remind you from refraining to deal with the matter publicly but instead submit a support ticket and we will investigate this properly.

This matter wont last long, I can assure you.

As much as I enjoyed reading this can you perhaps edit certain parts and about certain tribes? that way I dont have to remove it all together.

Thanks.
I'd be happy to, but it seems I can no longer edit it
 

CAERUS

Tribal Wars 2 Team
The issue with*** tribes is getting out of hand. Surely it is obvious to the TW2 mods that this is going on more and more. Reporting doesn't seem to make a difference so tribes just keep doing it.

Mitchaaus...

I would appreciate refraining from talking about these matters publicly like I've mentioned before.

Believe me they are being taking seriously, It may seem like your ticket doesn't get solved but i can assure you all matters are investigated thoroughly.

I'm happy to talk privately if you have an ongoing concern and maybe I can put your mind at ease :)

Thanks.
 
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do not waste your breath they do not care about the*** accounts as long as they are making money
 
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With All due respect to the tribes on this Realm...
They'll always be a few rogue people darted around who ll try it on.... but.
I think we all know the 2 tribes who are absolutely kicking the arse out of abusing alts right Now....

If u know. U know
 
With All due respect to the tribes on this Realm...
They'll always be a few rogue people darted around who ll try it on.... but.
I think we all know the 2 tribes who are absolutely kicking the arse out of abusing alts right Now....

If u know. U know
Rim and dac 100%.
 
Gotta love how some people can play in the same tribe as you for 3 worlds? and then suddenly your play style is that of a cheater when they are in another tribe... whilst they know how you as a tribe play,coordinate and communicate yet they think its cheating when you do well using the exact same play style,coordination and communication.
 
This world seems to be a good mix..I have seen some of these tribe on other worlds ..And my money is on 6 feet under..they will smash me again..but at least I will get take out by the best..
 
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